A 35-year-old woman wrote us an emotional letter about her problem: falling in love with her married neighbor. She asked us to share it so she could get advice from our readers. She said, “I can’t talk about this with my friends or parents, so I think your page is a good place to share. I really need advice. I know you might judge me, but please try to understand my side. Thank you.”
The woman, who wants to stay anonymous, shared her complicated story. She wanted to know what our audience thinks about her situation and was ready for some judgment.
She started her letter by saying, “I’m 35, and nine months ago, I had a messy breakup with my fiancé. I moved in with a friend and her husband, and we rent a house together. That’s when I met my neighbor, Kevin. He helped us move in, and I fell in love with him at first sight. We both take the same bus to work every day since we live in the suburbs of a big city.”
She explained, “I knew Kevin had a wife and kids from the start, but that didn’t stop me. He talked about them a lot and showed me their pictures on his phone. I saw family photos of him and his wife on their shared Facebook account. At first, I didn’t mind; it started as a silly crush.”
The woman continued, “Kevin is handsome, funny, and sweet. On the bus, he asked me about my job and life, and I could see he really cared about what I was saying. My ex never did that, and we often argued about it. Kevin does a lot for his kids; he brings them treats and talks to his little daughter on the phone during our bus ride because she needed comfort before a school presentation. It made me think how nice and caring he would be with me too.”
She added, “I felt that Kevin and I could become more than friends. I found out that his wife is someone I went to school with, and they are total opposites. He is funny and exciting, while she is dry and dull. He’s not very smart, but she is very intelligent. I thought they didn’t fit together, and I could see Kevin getting stuck in that relationship because he is so nice.”
Then she shared an emotional part of her story: “One evening, Kevin knocked on my door and asked if I could watch his kids for a few hours. I said yes right away. He told me his wife was in the hospital, and he was worried and needed to drive to see her. They don’t have any family nearby, so he asked me to look after their kids until a family friend could come later.”
That’s when the trouble started. She revealed, “Kevin’s kids were a total nightmare. They have three daughters. The oldest was a rude preteen who didn’t respect me and argued about everything. I even heard her call me names under her breath. The middle girl was loud and wanted to play messy games even when I told her not to. The youngest girl was sweet and quiet but quickly joined in the drama with her sisters.”
She added, “I eventually agreed to play hide and seek with the younger girls, but I ended up getting locked out of the house. When I tried to ask the oldest girl to let me in through the back door, she ignored me and put on her headphones. Luckily, Kevin’s family friend arrived a few minutes later and let me back in, and then I went home.
The woman ended her letter by saying, “The babysitting incident makes me really sad because I used to dream about being a stepmom to Kevin’s kids one day. Now, I want nothing to do with those difficult kids. But at the same time, it shows me that Kevin and his wife aren’t happy because kids from a happy family don’t act like this.”
She added, “I want to have a relationship with Kevin now, but I’m not sure if that’s possible because his kids and I don’t get along at all. Their mother could also make them dislike me. I really love Kevin, and I know we could have a wonderful relationship. But what happened with his kids has really shaken me. I just wish I had someone to talk to about this, but everyone in my life would just judge me.